Making Pizza Dough

Had to capture this moment between Ry and my Mama in the kitchen the other night. They were making pizza dough <3 br="">

Fishing

Last night was kinda epic! The boys have wanted to go fishing forever.... I don't know how to fish and neither does Peter so we needed to enlist some help. Enter Uncle Evan - Aunty Jean's boyfriend (but really let's just call him brother-in-law already).

We started at the south end of Baby Beach hoping the Oama were in (they weren't) but it was a great exercise in patience. And we got to swim a bit. I think next month the Oama will be by that sea wall there.

So we walked the beach to the Mala side and over by the boat ramp - still no Oama but there were other reef fish. The boys did an amazing job with patience. Uncle Evan was so kind to them showing them what to do. Aunty Jean helped with the bait and the poles.  It was just so awesome!

 Mala Wharf.... wish it was in better shape. We were on the boat ramp next to it.

 The boys and Uncle Evan getting all set up.

 This one above reminds me of a painting. The boys are so into what they're doing and a rainbow in the back.... Oh Maui. How I love thee.

 Cruz being super patient....

 Above: Cruz's first catch!!! Below: Cruz's second catch! Evan said this particular fish was a little slimy so Cruz didn't want to touch it. It was hilarious.

 Above: Kai being patient on the boat ramp side waiting for a fishy.
Below: Kai's catch of the day! It was a big one! He was over the moon excited!

 Below: Now they're like "How do we take it off?" -- so funny. Back into the water he went.

 West Maui Mountains..... ahhhhh..... love.

 The last dip of the poles before the sun went down.

Kind of wish I had brought my big camera - but the iphone pics still worked well. After we packed up, we told the boys we still had to walk to the other side of Baby Beach. It was getting dark but the moon had risen over Lahaina and put a moonlit glow over the whole beach. It was incredibly beautiful. Not a single complaint out of these boys. We even got back in the water for some moonlit swimming. It was incredibly magical!!

Cell phone snaps...

 It's been such a crazy, busy week. The fires on the Pali have not helped one bit.... it's really weird to see the mountain so brown and bare. We were FINALLY able to head to Olowalu for some swim time on Saturday.

Here's the boys being cold. Cruz was in a bad mood but I didn't care - real life! haha

We were all wet in the car but the sun was amazing and as we were driving home we decided to pull over and climb over a wall on the Pali to a lookout and watch the light fade. The boys didn't even care they were wet. We just watched and kicked rocks and had a moment. It was kinda perfect. 

4th of July

We had such a nice day yesterday! The boys were home from Summer Pals so it was just me and the two of them during the day. I tried to get some work done on my computer before giving up completely - it's just impossible when the kids are home.

When Peter got home from work we did an "All American" dinner - sort of. It was actually quite hilarious. Peter and Cruz wanted cheeseburgers, I wanted a tofu sandwhich, and Kai wanted Udon. So I had an internal laugh that what does "all American" even mean anyway?

We got some sparklers for the boys but they were total junk - it was a little disappointing until we were invited to the end of the street where the neighbors all pooled their fireworks together and the boys were over the moon to get to participate. This year they were finally able to handle themselves around the excitement - in years past I was always really nervous of them around the flames. This year they rocked it. The only thing we were missing was our little lady!

Hey... back...

I've gotten a few phone calls, thank you, from friends asking if I was ok - where have I been - have I stopped writing?

The truth of the matter is that I was in a rough place emotionally. I didn't want to write about all the wonderful things in my life, and there are many, because I was feeling down in the dumps trudging through mud and I didn't want to be fake and didn't want to make it seem like everything was fine. I already have to do that on other social media platforms and for whatever reason, this blog is my "safe place" to say what I want to say.

I'm working through all my issues and it's hard but possible.

The first half of 2016 is gone. We had an amazing trip to Disneyland in January, a trip to the Big Island, and I got to take Ry to San Jose and Austin (she's there for the summer and having a blast). Meanwhile I'm just trying to hold myself together. It's very hard to explain what's going on - maybe it's a mid-30's crisis I dunno.

I am a super happy, positive person so it's frustrating when I don't feel super happy. It's frustrating when I feel regrets for things I didn't do. In all honesty, looking back with 20/20 vision, I grew up too fast. Not that I started having kids too early, but more so I didn't HAVE FUN. I was so intent on working, making money, trying to succeed that I missed out on a lot of fun things and now I regret it. That's not to say that I would want to end up at a different end game, because that's not it at all.

Anyway, this post is to say I am OK - I'm here. I'm working on things. I'm working on myself because I need it.